It’s Borrowed and I Care Less Syndrome.

The Accident

About 4 years ago, 2 days before Christmas I had a car accident, the car was pretty much damaged. I was loaned a car over a long weekend by my insurance company pretty much - a courtesy gesture, while my car went through repair works. Since at the moment I didn’t need the car, my friend and his buddies hatched a plan to get away for the weekend… way past Eldoret… half way across the rift valley.  Driving in shifts they raced against the clock, knowing the car had to be back in 60 hours. They barely saw the beauty of the landscapes leading into Naivasha town before continuing on to Nakuru (and the untimely demise of a stray dog who smashed a headlight and dented the panels). Then they braved muddy floodwaters near the Uasin Gishu district and completely submerged the car. Miraculously they were able to restart it and drag the car back home. But there was no miracle for its condition – smashed, scratched, flooded and full of mud. Tuesday morning came, they returned what was left of the car, paid a paltry insurance excess and walked away. True story.

That’s what a lack of ownership will do. You’d never treat your own car like that. But there’s a proclivity in human nature that treats what belongs to someone else without respect, unless we cultivate a sense of ownership. Do you, and/or your team treat that company you work for like a borrowed car? Do you treat other people’s time and stuff as a borrowed car? You know you’ve got a ‘It’s borrowed and I care less Syndrome’ when you and/or your team doesn’t value the customers, the assets, the products, the reputation or the vision of your organization like the proprietor or [the boss] does; When you keep people waiting at your office door for hours as if their time does not count for anything. In great individuals and teams you get the sense that every person sees himself or herself as an owner.

My Little Gadget!

The first time I ever invested a significant chunk of my hard earned cents on a cell phone is when I bought an E-series Nokia phone, and I worked out pretty fast that if I needed help with my little gadget, I should go to Nokia, not to the phone company that sold it to me. I won’t name the phone company to protect the not-so-innocent but they represent what is worst about modern businesses. Staff blaming each other, repairs being outsourced to someone you can’t even speak to, you wait 30 minutes on hold to have some guy waffle about a ‘glitch in our system’. To be honest, I am a culprit on this, I’ve once used the same line to a client in my banking career, but hearing those words as a customer leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I don’t know about you.

But take your cell phone to one of Nokia’s service shop, and a lady or a gentleman with a white Pollo-shirt that reads “Nokia Care” will sit down with you and help you… face to face… because they love their product… they’re proud of it… and if something is wrong… they’ll fix it on the spot.

 Ownership

 So how can you as an individual or as a leader develop a culture of ownership in your own life and that of your team? It goes deeper than attaching people’s pay and bonuses to performance measures; All that is great. By contrast I’ve led teams in both for profit and Not-for-profit volunteer organizations where tens of people, if not hundreds have demonstrated deep levels of ownership without receiving a cent or an extra cent for it.

"A Leader is one who KNOWS the way, SHOWS the way and GOES the way. A manager says 'GO', a Leader says, 'Let's Go'." ~ John Maxwell

My Top 5 Ownership Strategies-

1. Demonstrate it daily. They’re watching what you do, not what you say. Do a standard check. If the standard is low, first do standard reset for yourself, then others will pick it up.

2. Reward ownership wherever you see it. You get what you focus on so make heroes (and managers) of those who are exemplars of true ownership.

3. Shift your language from “I” and “my” to “we” and “our”. It’s our business and we have a great opportunity here. It’s our relationship; It’s our marriage, We will make it work. This are our kids, we will raise them together.

             "A manager says 'go', a leader says 'let us go'." ~ John Maxwell

4. Allow people to take responsibility and authority. If you micro-manage people on your team, or you delegate responsibility without giving authority for execution, don’t be surprised when they shelf these ownership vibe.

5. Make sure your people can own the successes too. Ownership should include sharing in the plunder, not just the problems. That’s right.

I’d love to hear your comments and feedback. Share your own ‘Ownership Strategies’ with [the.champs.mind] blog family.

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Don’t USE a Hammer To Swat a Fly Off Someone’s Head.

“If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.”~ Abraham Maslow

I am a better person today because there are a few VIP’s in my life. They have taught me to summon my courage; how to hone my vision and strive toward my goals; they’ve taught me how to fail forward, how to make each day count and how to cultivate a can-do attitude. Through my interaction with them they have taught me multiple and invaluable lessons. I personally want to salute the following on this blog post; my parents, my pastors, my friends, mentors, and to an extend,  great authors and leaders who’ve helped me to transform my thinking and to make some quantum leaps in life through their books.

The following article isn’t my work but a portion adapted from Winning with People a book authored by John C. Maxwell an authority on matters leadership. Ladies and gentlemen, The thoughts expressed here will transform the way you relate to others; they will help you win with people. How do I know this? I am pretty much a better person now because I took this resource to heart. Without much ado, I give you none other than:

John C. Maxwell: On [Don’t Use The Hammer to swat a Fly Off Someone’s Head]

My wife, Margaret, and I were married in June 1969, and like most couples, we naively believed that nothing but smooth sailing lay ahead of us. Of course, it didn’t take long for us to find ourselves in the kinds of minor disagreements that all couples experience, especially when they’re first adjusting to married life.

Like most people, I thought I was right nearly all the time, and I let Margaret know about it. I’ve always been a good talker, and I can be pretty persuasive, so I used my skills to win our arguments. We never yelled or screamed at each other. It was always very rational and controlled, but I always made sure I won. The problem was that with my approach, Margaret always had to lose.

And I truly didn’t realize that winning at all costs could eventually jeopardize our marriage, until one day when Margaret sat me down, shared how she felt when we argued, and explained what it was doing to our relationship. It was the first time I understood I was putting winning the arguments ahead of winning the relationship.

From that day I decided to change. Realizing that having the right attitude was more important than having the right answers, I softened my approach, listened more, and stopped making a big deal out of little things. In time, the wall that had begun to form came down, and we began building bridges. And since that time, I’ve made a conscious effort to initiate connection anytime I’m in conflict with someone I care about.

‘Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser: teach a just a man, and he will increase in learning.’ Proverbs 9:9

Let’s face it. Because of their personalities, some people are inclined to use a hammer, even when something gentler will do. That’s my natural inclination. But now, when tempted to use overkill, I try to temper my behavior using the following four Ts. You may want to embrace them when you find yourself in a similar situation.

1. Total Picture.

Do you come to conclusions long before the problem has been laid out before you? That’s a common occurrence for most of us. To keep from hammering people with answers before they finished asking the question, I’ve trained myself to follow this process:

Listen,

Ask questions,

Listen again,

Ask more questions,

Listen some more,

Then

Respond.

I find that if I slow myself down, I’m more likely to respond patiently and appropriately.

2. Timing

When you act is as important as taking the right action. Even knowing when not to act can be important. Noted hostess and writer Lady Dorothy Nevill observed, “The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.”

It seems to me that the most common cause of bad timing in relationships is selfish motives. For that reason, when little things bother us, our number one objective must be putting our personal agendas aside and building the relationship. Once you’ve examined your motives, then you need to ask yourself two timing questions: 1) Am I ready to confront? That’s a pretty easy one to answer because it’s really a matter of whether you’ve done your homework. The second is harder: 2) Is the other person ready to hear? If you’ve laid a relational foundation, and the two of you are not in the “heat of battle,” then the answer is more likely to be yes.

3. Tone

The writer of Proverbs stated, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Haven’t you found that to be true? People often respond more to our attitudes and actions than to our words. And many petty conflicts occur because people use the wrong tone of voice. The next time someone says something to you in anger, respond with gentleness and kindness. In response, the other person is likely to tone down, if not soften, his attitude.

4. Temperature

As tempers flare, people are prone to dropping bombs when using a slingshot will do. And that can cause a lot of trouble because the size of a problem changes based on the heat applied to it. In general,

If the reaction is more heated than the action, the problem usually increases.

If the reaction is less intense than the action, the problem usually decreases.

That’s why I try to follow a self-imposed guideline that I like to call the Reprimand Rule: Take thirty seconds to share feelings – and then it’s over. Anytime we let a little thing create a big reaction (longer than 30 seconds), then we’re using a hammer.

Psychologist Abraham Maslow once observed, “If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.” That might work with some issues, but it’s a terrible way to treat people. Relationships require more judicious treatment. Pay attention to the Four Ts in conflict, especially regarding the little things, and you’ll be more likely to solve the problem while preserving the relationship.

Wow, there you have it, great insight from a great leader; John C. Maxwell himself. I hope you found this article useful to you.

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Be More. Do More. Have More

Enlarging Your Personal Capacity

Friday the 1^st of April, I had a privilege of attending the pre-launch of the soon to be released movie known as LEO at the Silverbird theatres at Westgate, thanks to a good friend for the invite. I must admit that, am not a showbiz guy, I kinda wasn’t very comfy at first with the whole thing, the attention, the cameras and the works, but I got to settle in-to the set-[film production speak]. We were treated to a fantastic cocktail reception, I had an opportunity to interact with the city’s finest; outstanding & successful businessmen, Christian leaders, government officials, media personalities, film producers, actors, artists, my goodness the list goes on.

 The invitees had an opportunity of watching the trailer than ran for less than 3 minutes, and a soundtrack music video done by Sauti Sol, an incredible experience it was. Leo is a Kenyan film produced in Kenya by a Kenyan, telling a Kenyan story. In my view, the best production ever in the history of Kenya’s film industry judging by the trailer.[More details on www.leothemovie.com ].

What inspired this writing was a speech made at the pre-launch by one of the film’s exec producers Mr. Steve [Not his real name]. He mentioned that he was at a point in his life where he felt that his passion to his current trade had waned out. In his words, He wanted ‘excitement in his life’, he wanted something fresh, something challenging. He wanted to EXPAND his capacity. He later met Ms. J [the brains behind LEO] who only had just a dream, creativity and a story to produce a movie telling a Kenyan story, he jumped on board and transitioned himself from being a water drilling guy into a film producer. Talk about the quantum leaps.

One year from now, I don’t want to be the same person as I am today. I want to grow. I want to become better and better. ~Oli Dalizu

When Mr. Steve finished his speech, it hit me that in every human being lies a need to Be More, to Do More and Have more. Now if you are in a point in your life where your passion has taken a nose dive, you are no longer excited to leave your bed early in the morning, you no longer love what you do; you may want to look at your life from at a different perspective. It could be time to  change trajectory as opposed to persisting.

Repeating the past won’t create a new future; dogged determination is dumb without clearly defined direction.’~Unknown

One way to do that, I realized was by expanding my personal capacity. Expanding my capacity means being able to do things I wasn’t capable of before. It means being able to handle things I previously couldn’t. If you consciously decide to expand your capacity, you will become a different person in the future. You will look back and see how much you’ve grown.

Here is an incomplete list of tips to expand your personal capacity:

1. Take a new Challenge

Expanding your capacity is like weight lifting. If you are able to lift 50Kgs but keep lifting that all the time, your capacity won’t increase. You need to move to the next level and lift something heavier. It will feel difficult at first, but over time it will become easy. Then, once you become comfortable with it, you should lift something even heavier.

Similarly, to expand your capacity you must take new challenges beyond your comfort zone. Work on something you aren’t comfortable with. Mr Steve Jones Jr. has to let go his water drilling business to venture into a new challenge, in this case film production.

Look at your current situation. How long have you been doing what you’re doing? When was the last time you took a new challenge? If you find yourself in a comfort zone then shake things up. Find a new challenge and take it.

In my case, I realize that I didn’t take a new challenge in the last year or two. I lifted the same weight for far too long. Now that I learn the importance of expanding my capacity, I’m working on a new challenge.

2. Make sure it’s Exciting

When you are looking for a challenge to take, make sure that it’s something you are excited about. I’ve tried to work on a challenge I wasn’t excited about. The results? Wasted Time, Money, and Effort. Working on something that’s not exciting feels like a chore. Those who know me personally understand that that doing laundry isn’t my favorite chore, I find the process a bore and irksome. Sometimes I must push myself to do it. But thank goodness for the concept of Outsourcing, I can remotely manage a service provider to make sure my clads are cleaned well.

On the other hand, if I work on something exciting then working on it feels effortless. Sure, there are times when I need to motivate myself, but the total amount of energy needed to get things going is much, much lower. Furthermore, I enjoy the time working on it. I want more of it, not less. I stay late, I wake up earlier working on it.  As a result, I move further ahead.  My friend Njoro says, ‘I find what I do exciting and effortless’

3. Make it Fun

Not only should you take an exciting challenge, but also you should make the process fun. In my case, I like to think of a challenge as a game. I have a challenge to overcome and I have some resources at hand. I need to allocate my resources wisely and work my way over the obstacles. There are surprises and pitfalls along the way. Isn’t it just like a game?

Thinking of a challenge as a game makes me more excited about it. It also makes it easier to handle failure. After all, loses are normal in games. They are something I need to go through if I want to become a better player. Rather than discouraging me, they make me even more motivated to increase my playing skill.

4. Focus

If the challenge is beyond your comfort zone, as it should be, then it won’t be easy. You need to focus your heart and mind on it. Don’t spread yourself too thin. Don’t try to do too many things at once. That’s a sure recipe for failure. Don’t be a jack of all trades and a master of none; become an authority in your new area of excellence. Focus!.

5. Invest

Some people are willing to take a new challenge but hesitant to invest their time and money in it. But if it’s a worthy challenge then it’s worth your time and money. There’s no reason not to invest in it.

Remember the game metaphor above? The resources you have in a game are there to help you achieve the game’s objective. You should invest them in weapons, buildings, and whatever other tools you need to achieve the objective. Similarly, you should invest your resources to expand your capacity. Don’t do it above your means, of course, but you get the point, right?#

6. Take Risks

The more you know about something, the less the risks involved. But in the beginning, when you are working on something new, risks are inevitable. Don’t be afraid to take them. Those who aren’t willing to take risks may never move to the next level. You might fail but you will learn a lot in the process. They will make you a better player.

People who just play safe will regret all the opportunities they’ve wasted in life. I don’t want to be that kind of people. I might fail, but at least I won’t regret myself for not trying.

7. Build the desire to Finish the Race.

'I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith' ~ Ref; Bible IITimothy 4:7

Your progress will be faster if you have the desire to finish what you started, which in this case is the challenge you take. This desire will fuel your effort every day to get better at what you do. It will also make you more resilient in the face of difficulties and setbacks. Without such a desire, your progress will be slow.

8. Move On Up

Once you achieve certain level of mastery in a particular challenge, move on and take a new, more difficult challenge. Don’t stop and be comfortable with where you are. Keep expanding your capacity. Build your momentum. [Check the article I wrote sometime last month ‘Fall Into The Groove; Gain Momentum’]. Have at it.

I’d love to hear from you. Share your tips on how we could expand our personal capacity. Feel free to share this article with your networks.

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